Wednesday, 13 March 2013
Guest Blogger Loin Licker
BDSM How far is too far?
One of my first introductions to BDSM was through Kim Dare’s Pack Discipline Series. I saw the blurb on book 1 and thought why not? I am glad that I did because it was an eye-opening and wonderful experience. Since then I have read many BDSM books both paranormal and contemporary, although I may lean towards paranormal. Hey, if I am going to live on the wild side why not go all the way? I like the kinkier side of a book, that naughty piece that your friends would be shocked to know that you are reading. My friends have no idea that I enjoy BDSM, ménage, M/M, etc. They would probably be shocked! It’s a long way from the Catholic school girl, right?
I read a book a few months ago, BDSM advertised, that I did not finish. I won’t mention the book title nor do I know how it ended, but it was an example of how far is too far, at least in my eyes. The young submissive was urinated and defecated on by multiple men. Then he was caned and meant to crawl on all fours. In my opinion, this was too far. My definition of BDSM is a complete trust in your partner that goes both ways. It is not meant to humiliate nor subjugate either party. It should be a mutual release and a complete satisfaction for both parties. It is the dominants job and duty to take care of the submissive; to see to that person’s every need and sexual satisfaction. Safe words are used for a reason, when someone is uncomfortable with the situation then all play should stop and things should be reevaluated for the benefit of both parties. I have a hard time reading a book if the BDSM advertised humiliates someone and makes him or her feel less than human. Bondage, spanking, flogging are all acceptable, among other things.
I’m also not into the whole “Master” thing. I don’t know, maybe there is a place for it but not in my world. I don’t mind reading it and I can see where the characters get off on it, but I can’t begin to imaging me calling anyone “Master”. It’s not that I don’t trust, but as an independent woman I would rather turn over the reins in other ways. I can be blind-folded, spanked, brought to the brink and then back again, but for some reason, “Master” just gets my goat up.
I think that BDSM is a beautiful thing and can be completely sensual and releasing for all involved. I love how the authors of my favorite books start out by molding the characters with their kinks and then allowing for the build-up. I love Sean Michael’s books because I believe the theme of BDSM is always tastefully done with a heavy dose of eroticism. My favorite series is the Hammer Series, where BDSM runs rampant. He writes the books so well that I think that I am right there with the Dom & Sub. I have never read a book in the series where I felt that it was taken to far.
I suppose that BDSM-themed books are not for everyone, but I think that you should try it before you judge. Start out small. There are plenty of books out there in every genre that can ease you into the theme. Go for it!
Happily Lapping Around,